I can tell by the syntax that our reality simulation isn’t a Bethesda product. Well that and the lack of random at collision doesn’t regularly launch things across the sky.

How many different stimulants can you consume before all your blood sprays out through your pores?

Magical Realism is the water turning into people wearing white clothes.

Surrealism is water turning into an army of ducks invading the kingdom of clocks made out of ice cream

Unrealism is water running uphill and turning into diamonds.

Too-Realism is water flooding an apartment and wrecking everything.

Hope that clears it up for ya.

Nobody in real life would do stonework while wearing pristine, brand new white clothes, so yeah the categorization checks out.

Motherfucker must be getting altitude sickness from how high his petard has hosted him.

Actually that’s an illusion caused by the picture being a still frame and not a video. In actuality his Eldritch master is displeased with the inferior quality of his oppression, and is taking the cop into the sky. His demise will be slow and agonizing, but hey, that’s what happens when you sign a pact in blood but then don’t make your quotas.

Oh hey, they upgraded it to Mystery Beef? Nice. Things are looking up

I’m so glad I’ll be dead by then. And with no kids to have to suffer through the even worse future to come.

Why do they have their own castle?

What about an elbow to the throat?

Hungry and bored. Borgry? Hured?

Context required, you need to drink a lot of fucking alcohol to pickle a liver that badly.

I like it. As a decent American I both appreciate freedom of speech and have a sense of humor about myself and my country. I also have great shame for the state of my country.

Also ICE.

I’m not going to lie, if tea put me in a dreamless sleep for 12-24 hours, I would actually drink it no matter how vile it tastes.

Why do these ice cubes taste more geometric than usual?

DAD! HEY DAD! Can you name something after me?

The price of not caring about so sportsball: free.

Hey if you’re with somebody who likes to do stuff that you don’t that’s your choice.