Mayhem
Does JK Simmons count as being a mascot? 🤔
That would be his character, Professor Nathaniel Burke of the University of Farmers. We don’t know how much of a badass Prof Burke is, but we do know how much of a badass Simmons is.
The LiMu Emu.
Those birds are fucking strong.
AND DOUG!
Doug’s gonna last about nine seconds.
The won not one but two wars!
Geico piglet with pinwheels
Mr. Rodgers in a bloodstained sweater, ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny-style.
Geico’s got a bunch of buff, erudite cavemen in their stable, don’t forget.
I vote the cavemen if they come as a group
Erin esurance, hands down.
All enter the arena and are all instantly vaporized by a death ray.
The peasants rejoiced.
Right. Yes. It’s the mascots on track toward this contest. Sure.
No sir. I didn’t hear anyone say CEO.
Jake from State Farm, because apparently he can transform from a doughy white dude in khakis to a thin, cool, young, light-skinned black guy.
The GEICO gecko, for sure. He’s small and quick so it would be easier to evade attacks while everyone else kills each other.
The general duh, he’s got modern munitions.
Doesn’t the emu have a gun?
or was that the Glockstrich?
Hmm, The General’s tough but he’s also short. I bet the emu would fuck him up with one kick!
Flo is actually gangsta af
Mayhem.
