Last night I had a hookup for the first time. I told the guy I wanted him to use a condom, which offended him because he was like, “Why do I need to use one if you already have an IUD? Do you think I’m some STD-ridden guy?” I told him I just don’t know him that well. Either way it was fine in the end, he put it on and it was a fine night. Now I’m thinking, was I being a pushover?
When skydiving, is a backup parachute over the top?
Sounds like you fucked a little baby boy
you get to choose what goes into your body, nobody else.
The fact that he didn’t do it by himself tells you he did not wear it with any previous partners who didn’t make him. So yes, that puts his likelihood of STD rather high.
You were 100% right to make him wear one.
What confuses me is why does he know about it but you said hookup so maybe you have known him awhile. My wife and I had doctors appointment were we both got std tests to show we were good on that front but we still used condoms because of the whole pregnancy thing but she did not have an iud. It would worry me if I was you that he wanted to do it without knowing if you had stds.
no
I probably would have left, a comment like that would have killed the mood. He does know he could have an STD and not even know he has one (or two)… right? He is the type that is just living on a wing and a prayer. No thanks!
Your limits, your rules, safety first politeness second!
“Do you think I’m some STD-ridden guy”
Jesus what an ignorant thing to say. Having an STD doesn’t make you a bad person or anything, it’s not a reflection on him if he did have an STD, it’s just a medical situation that requires certain precautions. So if your hooking up, then you inherently younever know so you HAVE to be safe.
Glad it wasn’t a big problem and you had fun, but what an ass.
yeah that would have ended the evening right there.
Anyone who says “we don’t need to use a condom” is someone who you should 100% use a condom with
Not at all. IUDs are 99% effective, but if you don’t wanna risk that 1% chance, that’s your decision.
Condoms also protect against STIs.
If you want them to put a condom on before they have sex with you they shouldn’t be arguing. They should either respect your boundaries, or go find someone else with boundaries that are more compatible with their desires.
IUDs are 0% effective vs. STDS. They wil prevent pregnancies 99% of the time. Let’s do some homework here.
That’s what I meant, I just expressed it poorly.
Condom’s always on. What I have been told in sex-ed back in the days: you need to be in an exclusive relationship with your partner for over a month, then both take a blood test for STI. Only if you come both clean, show each other your test results, only then you’re good to go without condoms.
If a guy ever tells you he doesn’t like condoms, it feels bad or whatever BS excuse like that, you tell him to:
- Read the fucking manual on the box to learn how to put it on correctly
- Get the right size for his dick
Condoms don’t feel bad if you wear the correct size and put it on correctly.
… Wait, there’s different sizes? I’ve literally never seen a size on the box. Though admittedly I don’t think I’ve ever read the fine print.
Size information is actually not very clearly indicated. I will admit it’s not so simply knowing what size you need. The gritt (dick circumference) is the information to look for, it should be indicated on the box in millimeters, at least it is were I live.
If you want him to wear a condom, he wears a condom. If he wants to wear a condom, he wears a condom. Its that easy.
But specifically for hookups/people you font know that well its proper etiquette to always wear a condom unless discussed otherwise (if you’re both fine with it, and have discussed your health/have recently been tested)
No, absolutely not. Any guy who pushes back against condom use is not worth sleeping with. I’ve been with my BF for years at this point and we still (usually) use condoms because it gives me more peace of mind.
You can have STIs without knowing it. STIs can kill you. No, you are not overreacting
