Mfer if you have the videos you’d know that’s not leaking that’s pee. Gallons and gallons of pee.
You want to stuff me and make me leak?
“Give it to me. I’ll leak it myself.”
…
“Now, I am the leaker!”
I don’t see any other way to deal with this than leak them yourself.
Right?
Wait, you have pictures? Which ones? I wanna make sure they’re the good set.
Okay Hamilton
Makes me leak
My favorite is the one when they text me that they hacked my phone and took video of me masturbating while watching porn. I’m like “homie, knowing that you’re watching makes it so much hotter”.
“Give me $7000 in bitcoin or I will send the video to your loved ones.” Uh, joke’s on you motherfucker.
That’s when you go all technology noob on them and ask them to guide you how to pay them.
That would be kind of funny if it worked. “I’ll give you the $7000, but to do it I’ll need you to set up an Amazon gift card in my name with $100 in it.”
A Kitboga classic
“Oh no! Not the thing with the garden hose and the lion I hope?!”
ifunny will be around till the heat death of the universe lol
I had a spam email this morming that started out something like “Greetings Sinner”
And I was just like, damn right, then deleted it.
What an opener, I’m going to use that one. Thanks, sinner
The #1 tennis player in the world’s name is Yanik Sinner. What a bad ass family name.
My fav is to reply with memes, like this (I know you aren’t supposed to, since they’ll know your account is active):
I hope this finds you well, NULL. John Lastname. If this email isn’t the best way to contact you, maybe XXX-XXX-3681 is?
You do not know who I am, but I know all about you. You may have heard of Pegasus? If not, let me fill you in: I have access to your phone, PC, and every smart device in your house at 123 Fake Street. I have your Facebook, your LinkedIn, and even your phone contacts. While you thought you were alone, I saw every disgusting, illegal thing you were searching. I have recordings of you side by side with the interesting videos you were watching.
Don’t get me wrong, John. I’m not a monster. I know what they will do to people like you in prison, and I’m willing to offer you a sliver of hope. Send me $2000 USD in bitcoin to { btcWallet %} within the next 48 hours and I will make sure nobody else finds out about your guilty little habit. If you cooperate, I will run my program that guarantees every last video of you is shredded. If you don’t, well, let’s just say that you won’t ever get this opportunity again. You know what they say about things on the internet: once it’s up, it’s never coming down.
And John, don’t think you can pretend this will go away. I embedded a tracker in this email. I know when you received it. I know when you opened it. Remember: 48 hours. What happens next is your choice alone.
Live your life in such a way that if the worst shit you do gets leaked, everyone in your life’s response will be:
“hahaha… yeah… that’s classic him/her.”
The implication is it’s nudes or a sex tape. Something private, not shameful.
We live in a world of democratized porn if anyone.
I think people should have rights over their own images and the LLMs that create them should be shut down as a failed experiment, but respect to anyone that disarms the bullies and blackmailers of the world like the woman in this pic.
Man I’ve been a fat lesbian my whole life, ain’t no fucking way anybody is going to take nude pics of me hell I don’t even want clothing pics of me. Now I’m an old married fat lesbian, sure the fuck am not going to start taking nudes at this point
nice username
Have you never heard of rule 34?
😂
Speaking just for myself, if someone wants to beat it to my freaky naked ass, I’d be flattered.
I guess even in the case that that would bother me, we live in an era where anybody with any photo of anybody can produce hours of AI generated fakes anyway.
I come down firmly on the “The people who matter don’t care and the people who care don’t matter” side of this.
If you get blackmailed and the leverage is based on information, never comply because you can’t trust the blackmailer to destroy the leverage or not leak it. Otherwise they can blackmail you over and over.
If you get blackmailed with anything, go to the police. Blackmail is extremely illegal.
If only the cops were trustworthy…
And only if the blackmailer is in a jurisdiction that gives a fuck.
The police are not your friends. Think of them like HR for society. 😅
acting like my body is a crime scene instead of a work of art
Why not both?
An art crime?
The best kind of art
The KGB considered french diplomats immune to blackmail due to how widespread cheating is. When they approached them, the diplomat would ask for a copy the tape so they could show off how hot their hookup was.
True story ? pretty cool
Very widespread story. As to the truth of it, who really knows?
Considering how the French seem to like portraying themselves, it’s probably at least partially true.
Entirely possible. It was certainly way, way more socially acceptable in France than in the US.
The exhibitionist in me would get my clue so hard knowing I got leaked
I’ve got a raging clue
exhibitionist
no posts or links in profile
Aww, tease :(
Reminds me of when that model tried to blackmail Jagr and he did not give a fuck.
I remember one of those malware scams that install a program that ran full screen on your PC, took a pic of you with your webcam then claim it found CP on your PC with FBI logos and shit. Then asked for gift cards to “drop the investigation”
I love reading those in my camera-less PC.
I used to work at a PC repair shop. It was always a laugh when a parent brought one in with a teenage boy in the webcam shot.
“Ma’am. Your son probably didn’t download CP. This is just a scsre tactic scam to try and get money from you. Do you think the FBI would drop an investigation for some gift cards from Walmart?”
