fuck I’m not in the right headspace when I’m asking this, unresolved trauma. Now I’m repeating in my head “love them more than my mental illnesses”.
I wanted to warn an organization i cared about my past and that manipulation comes naturally to me to the point where I don’t notice after the fact. I legit want see them succeeded and stand in blind solidarity.
I have reached out someone in the organization about my issues. I’m hoping they respond.
If you wish to address these behaviors you need to speak with a therapist. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. It’s like a workout for your brain. We really can’t help you. I wish you well. It’s possible to change and better yourself, but only if you truly wish to.
Yes.
that’s noted. but i need reasons, i have to process the logic behind the answer
I mean, the logic behind the answer is right there in the question itself. If you’re trying to be honest person because you respect this place, and it’s people, which it seems you are-
Telling them it’s in your nature to deceive is definitely a way to protect them. Even if it’s from you yourself.
okay, okay, i get it. thanks for sharing ill reread it when I sober up.
Hey man best of luck bettering yourself. I respect it.
Thanks for saying that. Some of these other users are frustrating
Btw I got good sleep
Good sleep is important, especially after a night of introspection. It’s not a couple of days thing, it takes months to change a single habit. Keep at it and youll turn around in no time and think “i used to be like that”
Are you sure you’re actually a narcissist? One of the big tells is that narcissists are totally incapable of seeing it in themselves, and would never dream of having enough empathy and self-reflection to share that with others. You actually seem like you care. Maybe you are better than you think.
I mean, sociopaths exist, and definitely deserve a cheaper option than therapy to start the process.
I’ve been working on myself and trying to be a better person. I’ve seen the beauty of nature and see how the entire history biosphere has made me and the bacteria i rely on and the food i eat. i learned to love every living thing because i can use them to influence events well beyond my death. I should learn to love other people because they’re the most capable species
None of this sounds truly narcissistic. If you were truly narcissistic, you would be blaming the world for everything, working on nothing, and saying nothing like what you’ve said here.
You’d be blaming Biden for your problems.
I’ve done that in the past. and i work on absolutely destroying ego’s for my amusement. it’s my favorite hobby
That doesn’t sound narcissistic…that sounds kind of awesome.
yeah I enjoy it, i actually hesitant to encourage that behavior or give people advice on that. I don’t want mentally abusive tactics being used by irresponsible people or other lesser narcissists.
It doesn’t sound like narcissism (from my own experience with narcissistic people). It sounds more like you are having some sort of episode. I’d strongly, strongly suggest getting in touch with a professional. I genuinely hope you are okay.
yeah. agreed. this is someone going through something, and drawing an intense and overly corrective conclusion. perhaps from a over developed sense of shame or guilt that has lead them to this conclusion.
or perhaps they were in a relationship with a narcissist and that person has manipulated them into being their are the narcissist… and need to warn others about it… that is something a narcisst would do to someone else!
i once had a relationship with a very unwell person, who tried to convince me of my own mental illness, which was a projection of their own. this person was also a practicing therapist… and i never realized how horrible it all was until a like 2 years later i saw therapist who pointed out to me how this fucked up and horrible this person really was and how unprofessional it was. esp because they basically like went down the dsm 5 and kept trying to convince me i had SOMETHING.
Man reading your evaluation of me is interesting. Mostly just a shot in the dark damn they really wanted to practice psychology, do see other narcissist have a hard time hiding their narcissism from other people, I probably have a subtle aura around me
No, you’re just dumb and delusional and full of yourself.
That’s not narcissism, it’s you being an average person. Most people think they have magical auras. They are wrong.
and your here on the internet, trying to bias-confirm yourself about how special and unique and amazing you are. just like everyone else.
… I’m not calling the “subtle aura” magical, it’s just short hand for how my demeanor hints at my narcissism 😑
Love the hostility I’m getting and the finger wagging I’m getting.
all of which means you’re not a narcissistic dude.
narcissists don’t enjoy finger wagging and hostility. they hate it and they fly into a rage when it’s done to them.
why is it that you want so badly to be a narcissist? because it will give you a excuse to justify something shitty you did to folks?
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im malicious to people i think deserve it. I dont have to pegged as a gennerally malitious (was gonna say narcissist, but your no where close to that), id say you’re a generally mentally healthy person, few flaws I can tug at (it would be petty to tug at them). I tell IDF solider that I hate them that they’re awful human beings and i hope that i hurt them emotionally, i love making people that advocate war crimes realize theyre the villian and crash out, and i openly told my maga neighbor that zohran mamdani is doing a good job to mess with him an hour ago.
the issue is I’m basically predatory against societies worst.
You might have mental health issues, but I kind of doubt you have those ones just from the basic context.
I’m going to say no. Try to be nice, let people figure out the rest. And look for some kind of support if possible.
I got a keep it simple and do the right thing mindset.
I assume you’re asking this because you’d like to reduce the impact of that kind of behaviour.
If that is your goal, then it would be best attained by going to psychotherapy. NCD/ASPD cannot be healed, but it can be treated and its effects greatly reduced, assuming you’re willing to put in the work.
There is no point in telling them. They either already know or will find out once they meet you.
What a deeply worrying post.
Yeah from my end there’s no one who can relate to me.
I’m exercising and gonna try to eat vitamins and unprocessed foods.
I’m also telling another person that Im concerned for them.
I’m not gonna give into toxic behavior
Your post and subsequent comments are exhibiting toxic behaviors.
Even my last reply? 😑
Being aware of your unwanted behaviour is the first step towards modifying it. Good luck!
No one is perfect. You are not alone or uniquely problematic in struggling with certain behaviors you don’t like about yourself. We don’t generally need to publicize our flaws up front. Rather than just telling them you are X negative trait, I think asking for specific safeguards that can help would be appropriate. Like, let’s say you often lie to get out of aspects of work you don’t like- be upfront with your limits on what you are able to tolerate and where you may not be able to.
if i can get it right sounds like this is a way to broach the subject. my reaction is that i can tolerate a lot, generally I can manipute people without lying and my simply moving erratically, talking about all the acts of charity I do. i do meal shares, i go to city council meeting out of blind faith in class solidarity, and I contribute to the members of the organization without asking anything in return. i can make myself look super freaking awesome and rub it in peoples face. also i set up all those things as trap for anyone that wants to attack me to get utterly humiliated.
best way for me to articulate that in my state
I just want to say that this level of self reflection is admirable given your challenges. Tell people you trust or people that need to know only. As far as stigma goes, nobody has it worse.
Have you been diagnosed as such by a psychiatrist?
Yeah, something else seems to be going on. A narcissist doesn’t consider warning people about themselves.
I was gonna say something like this.
Narcissists have a very hard time accepting they’re narcissists.
If you think “hmm, I might be a narcissist” you’re almost certainly not.
But you might be a hypochondriac or have Munchausens
well a guy claiming to by a psychiatrist said i wasnt a psychopath but instead a sadist and dipped. and i think i got diagnosed as that kind of depression where you don’t feel as high of swings
Do you mean bipolar 2? Depression isn’t really known for having highs at all.
oh no you can feel different levels of shit for sure, you can have suicidal thoughts then it stops… I don’t know psychology all that well. manipulation is more intuitive for me. i mean that as more context for what i actually mean
What do you mean by them claiming to be a psychiatrist? If you saw them in a professional capacity (i.e. office visit, whether in person or virtual, that insurance paid for, at least in part) then yes, they were a licensed psychiatrist. If it was some random person online, then it’s doubtful
weird when I get drilled for a claim someone made. the context is that its apocryphal. they said they worked with psychopaths in a psych ward i think (memmories fuzzy but its in one of my lemmy accounts). I actually do agree with him and it caused a little self reflection
So, no, you haven’t had a professional evaluation? Internet comments are not a diagnosis
So are you a dick to everyone that admits they’re not in the right headspace or just me. I admit I’m a manipulative narcissist that can make people like you feel shitty. I already pointed out in the past that Lemmy users are mentally ill and need to confront their issues.
I’m speaking objectively, I’m not criticizing you. Your emotional and defensive response says more about you than me. I encourage you to step back and look at what was said again.
No i actually putting the idea in your head that you’re bringing demanding and toxic in your head.
I had another guy ask me how I was sexually assaulted and their first thought was to ask if dry humping was penetration…
Why not just talk to a professional?
time, just happened yesterday
Your employer is not your therapist.
That seems kind of antisocial and would get a lot of attention, so yeah, win-win!
Probably a question that should be discussed with a therapist. I dont think people here can give a good answer as we lack to much context.
yes, but this is also a straight up troll.
legit narcissists don’t think they are manipulating people, or being narcissists. they see their behavior as ‘natural’. they also don’t talk about their trauma.
There’s plenty of narcissists that know they’re narcissists, and there’s therapy tools to help them participate in the world in a more healthy manner, but as you sorta indicated, it’s very rare any want to, and even more rare than any actively go down that path, so seeing someone speaking as if they’re struggling with it internally without seeing any sign of having already developed those tools makes it highly unlikely they’re legit. Probably just regular old mental illness of some sort, maybe attention seeking coupled with drug use and emotional instability. Wonder if they’re single, that’s right up my alley.
Weird how often I see this take. Narcissism is really Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and it is possible for someone with NPD to recognize they have it and want to change. Not super common, but it is possible.
“weird how often I see people assuming people with NPD are going to continue to exhibit traits of NPD”
is possible for someone with NPD to recognize they have it and want to change.
at this point they are ceased being a narcissist.
Yep, although it’d be pretty surprising if it went like this. OP is straight up worried they’re being bad to others, and willing to invite embarrassment by announcing it. (Unless they never really meant it)
Like, amateur over-the-internet diagnosis is worthless, but BPD would fit the almost no information we have better.
Sure they will want to change, but they can’t, and won’t. Narcissists are the worst.
