just buy roller blade wheels
Have you already forgot? 24-year-old attempting to rollerblade across the entire US killed in hit-and-run
California here we come.

I can’t wait to go across the country in my office chair.
Finally I can go offroading in my office chair!
Half pipe, rallying, ski jumping, the possibilities are endless.
Office chair racing will no longer be limited to the office floor
See your body into the moonlight Even if I try to cancel All the pictures into the mind There’s flashing in my eyes
DOoT DootT Dooh Dooh DOOOOtt Doot
Parkour!
Can you imagine being the person that got paid to take this bad boy on the road for 10,000 miles? That’s nearly once around the world. MFer probably took this chair from Alaska to Chile along the Pacific Coast.
This is beautiful.
Damn. And right after Jackass did their last movie.
i mean, it’s giving me some ideas how to add functional suspension to my bike, but other than that
10,000 fucking miles. What is this magic?
Probably ran the casters on a conveyor belt/treadmill for whatever length of time.
At a speed of 3.5 mph, youd only have to run the treadmill for about 12 days to get 10,000 miles. There are testing facilities that you can hire for this.
Or its all made up.
You can continue testing something after you break it.
9,000 miles further than I’d walk just to be the man who walks a thousand miles to fall down at your door.
Every breath you take, every move you make, every bond you break, very step you take, I’ll be watching you.
Never buy luggage with anything less than 50000 tested wheel miles. You never know if it might fall out the back of a truck and get dragged several thousand miles to your destination.
Not to worry, I only drive kilometres not miles
Warranty voided.
Almost spit out my coffee reading this one, lmao.
I only buy luggage that’s been tested at mach 1.2 or higher. You know, in case it falls out the back of the plane. And safety factor.
You pay a little extra for it, but what’s money when peace of mind is at stake?
Its still little rectangles of printed paper and minted coinage.
Oh look at Mr. 2D paper here, while we have to deal with all the thickness of 3D.
that’s like, 500% wheelier than the industry leading wheel
And the spring glows, like in the picture, right? Right … ?
Only when orcs are near
And it shall be called “Sproing” and will glow when orcs are near, or when elven ears can detect the musical stylings of “Jump Around” by House of Pain
What about the Insane Clown Posse version?
Well in the picture it shines, being made of metal and all (and being a rendering it looks extra shiny) , and since they have to paint it anyway for corrosion protection it may end up actually looking like that if they go with blue. In reality I kinda doubt they would choose blue, since black and transparent paint would give a more office approved look.
I can’t believe they missed the opportunity to say it’s “Wheel Engineered”

Skeptical.

A wall is a surface. Are they claiming this wheel is stable on a wall?
A lake is also a surface.
The sun has a surface, too. Bold claims for a wheel.
Does it come with AI, tho?
The suitcase probably has a display and an app you need to run to unlock it.
Okay, but for real the spring suspension could be great for a rolling cart or something in my garage for jumping over extension cords or standing mats.
You think they’d say something like “wheel reinvented” if it weren’t truly revolutionary, pun intended?
We had a baby stroller with similar wheels, they where indeed great. You could turn and push the thing with one finger.
It’s like a double wheel. A wheelwheel.
















