- cross-posted to:
- memes@lemmy.ml
- cross-posted to:
- memes@lemmy.ml
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Trans lifehack
Was about to ask where to find some, asking for a friend of course
But it would make you a nullo?
If, hypothetically, some sort of person who didn’t have a dick and balls were to eat it?
It’s expunging 15g of crotchmeat no matter what you do or don’t have, so buckle up.
So, for reference, studies like the sources for this article suggest the average human penis weighs between 70-100 grams.
So you’d be growing a micropenis at 15g. Not quite the effusive expulsion you were imagining.
Oh. So if someone had a
Wait. Penises get erect by engorging with fluid. Do you lose a smaller percentage if you have an erect vs flaccid penis while eating one?
you get all the dicksandballses that have fallen off since the last dickandballsless person to eat one
So this is just a snack for all trans people?
Yeah, like David Bowie
Wait wait wait hold up
sold!
we’re forcefemming the
whiteblackdiamondhouse~It does not, in fact, do that.
“Speak for yourself” he says in a comically high voice.
Eunuchs do not have particularly high voices if made eunuchs as adults. One does not undergo a reverse puberty if the gonads are removed.
Free orchidectomy and penectomy? Where are these apples found? Asking for a friend
An apple a day keeps the doctor away…because now the doctor is too depressed to go to work and be a doctor…
No, she’s fine.
[several transfems are typing…]
Mm…mmmrrroow 🥺
Damn, I just want my balls off. I wanna keep my dick.
What if I just have a nibble?
I’ve never heard someone say that before. Why would you want one but not the other, if you don’t mind my asking?
Well, you could still pee standing up.
my dude, the she-wee has existed since, uh, plastic. maybe only as long as women have served in the military.
Not a very common thing to find in the wild.
i bet if you plucked a pitcher plant it would work
Hello! I’m not the person you asked but I figured I’d throw in my experience.
In my case, if I could snap my fingers and instantly change my penis to a vulva, I would. But I had a haemorroid surgery many years ago, and the month or so afterwards was one of the worst times of my life, so I would prefer it if no surgeon ever went anywhere near my lower trunk ever again.
But everyone’s experience is different. Some women just like to fuck, and of the trans women who do, some don’t feel the need to replace the factory installed equipment for doing so.
I remember Snow White a little differently from this
You know all those stories were sanitized.
I’m not sure you really want that. As a horny teen I wanked myself dry a few times and it is painful. Imagine it felt like that every time.
No, I’m positive I want that.
I think as a teen we all went a little too hard with our equipment once or twice lmao
Balls only make sperm, the fluid is the prostate(?) or smthn, it comes from inside the body.
How could one fund an orchard to provide these for free to transfem women?
And conservative men.
I don’t believe in hurting anyone who has the potential to be converted into anarchist allies.
But what others do, is up to them but I only suggest that those nearest to the top are those least likely to be converted.
That’s basically where I was going with the joke, anyway. I’m hoping this could be the change they need to reassess their life and join the human race.
i mean, yeah i got you were joking. one of my firmest morals is that people have the right to choose what they put in their bodies and in order to do that they have to know what they are putting in it and what it will do. but like, woooooo this apple is going to forcefemme you is kinda funny.
Lol exactly
it’s black because it grew from an oil spill
For those curious, this apple does exist (though it’s more of a very dark purple) and it grows at high altitude in Tibet. The altitude gave it its colour.
dammit i live near apple country (it’s why i smoke with apple half the time. applewood is cheap as hell out in placerville) and i have a goal of eating every varietal of apple. just that’s it. every varietal of apple. why the hell not when you live near apple country, right? (like i just went out to watsonville and got me some olallieberries and even better got to talk with Nita fuck yeah) you mean i have to fly to tibet to eat this?
And its effect on one’s delicate bits?
Never mind is just a very expensive apple
Wow, I’d love to try…
holdup
🥚
“i’ll try anything once” oh shit
Omg that’s horrible…
Where can one find one?
Calm down there Eve
No, thanks. I hate sweet apples. Give them to us sour and crunchy.
