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Disappointing others.

I’m agoraphobic. It’s practically impossible living your life without leaving your house though.

Even taking out the trash or checking my mailbox can be an ordeal. I’d much rather have a regular phobia, like spiders, snakes, clowns, or something easier to avoid.

That someone is mad at me and I don’t even know I’ve wronged them.

The two most dangerous hours a day are going to and from work. I’m just one screwed up human away from death every day. Chances are there are a lot of them that are screwed up.

Other drivers. For god sakes. I live in the Washington DC/Baltimore MD area and while driving around here has always been a lot like Death Race 2000, it has gotten absolutely insane since covid.

Traffic signs are clearly just suggestions, people have no issues just blocking the thruways in parking lots. At least once a week I will just barely miss being in a fender bender.

Being hit by a car while I’m riding my bike to or from work

My most common are also my greatest.

Fear of death of my parents.

The risk of harm to my kids.

I’m constantly afraid that I’ll get fired. Not for anything in particular, just that it’ll happen randomly and without notice… which has happened to me several times over the last decade or so. I hate living in an ‘at will’ state.

That I am going to lose my fucking mind. I have untreated psychiatric issues so it’s not only possible but at some point probable. Every day feels like a roll of the dice but I white knuckle through.

I’m a manager for a pest control branch. Mine is someone calling out. Particularly on a Monday. Seriously. That and the sales guys texting me that they all of a sudden decided to go to a different area without telling me beforehand and I have no one near there. Both of these happen all the time but are beyond my control.

Those are just work ones.

For everyday things, I have this crazy tradition that sometimes I procrastinate going somewhere because I have to leave at exactly the right time to avoid a car accident or something like that. Almost like I have convinced myself that the reason I wait a few minutes before walking out the door is because I am waiting for what I perceive to be the perfect time so that the one crazy person driving out there will have either gotten past where I’m going or I will somehow avoid them. I hope that makes sense.

that the constant anxiety and panic attacks are just permanent now, and I will keep losing my grip until I’m living curled up in the fetal position as everything goes to literal shit around me

Getting hit by a car or stabbed by a methhead. Or getting hit by a car driven by a methhead who then gets out and stabs me.

Edit - sorry it double posted for some reason

Getting attacked by a crazy druggie.

I dont care how much it costs I just need a political party to come up with a solution for this shit. I’m down for any solution at this point.