Transcript

Panel 1: [Sarah wearing white robes with small angel wings and a halo bends down to receive a spotted dog with little angel wings that runs at here. They stand on clouds]

Off screen: Welcome to Heaven! Here is your dog!

Panel 2: [Sarah pets the happy dog absently while looking up at the off screen speaker]

Sarah: Where’s my cat?

Panel 3: [Sarah stands, one hand still petting the dog as she looks around at all the different dogs in heaven.]

Sarah: Where’s ANY of the cats?

Panel 4: [Cats stand on their hind legs, holding paws, dance in a circle surrounded by the flames of hell]

Sarah’s Scribbles on Tumblr @sarahseeandersen on BlueSky

  • Lovable Sidekick@lemmy.worldEnglish
    0·
    1 month ago

    Scientists confirm, if humans vanished from the planet and cats remained, within six months every object on Earth would be knocked on the floor.

  • ChicoSuave@lemmy.world
    0·
    1 month ago

    I’ve only had one insidious darling of a cat. The others have been cuddle addicted fuzzy motors who don’t even knock stuff off shelves. Two of them play fetch! Practically dogs.

  • M137@lemmy.today
    0·
    1 month ago

    There’s definitely gonna be a lot more dogs than cats in hell. If we go by the rules of the bible, killing a human will make you go there and a lot more dogs kill humans than cats do.

      • Sundray@lemmus.orgEnglish
        0·
        1 month ago

        AFAIK, there’s not direct mention of what happens to animals when they die, but many modern interpretations say that if Heaven is a paradise for humans, and if animal companionship makes humans happy, then there will be animals in Heaven.

        Then again there are sects that believe that basically everyone in Heaven is brainwashed to be happy all the time just to be in God’s presence, and that the only activity there is round-the-clock praise and singing, so animals don’t really have a place there. Which is two kinds of shitty: what kind of “paradise” is no pets AND endless church?

        • schipelblorp@sh.itjust.works
          0·
          1 month ago

          Legit some Christians think Heaven will be Heaven because they will be enjoying watching the eternal torment of the sinners below.

      • backalleycoyote@lemmy.today
        0·
        1 month ago

        Yeah, well, the Bible sucks. Odin literally has wolves chilling under the feasting table at Valhalla and Freya is a battle-crazy cat lady. If you like animals, find your way to Asgard. It’s also delightfully free of Christians!

          • backalleycoyote@lemmy.today
            0·
            1 month ago

            Yeah, and that’s my American bias showing. The potential I might die violently doing something as mundane as grocery shopping is a daily risk factor. The admission fee is low here so I forget there’s a lot of folks who don’t have an easy path to the halls of glory. But even without a violent death, you still get to chill in Hel’s domain with your ancestors, Garm the Hellhound is there, and only murderers and oath-breakers go to Niflhel to spend eternity being gnawed upon by dragons and serpents. Average people, flaws and all, get an average afterlife instead of eternal torment for minor transgressions like eating meat on a specific day or the blasphemy of being a woman and wearing pants.

      • tyler@programming.dev
        0·
        1 month ago

        No, it doesn’t say that. Many Christians just interpret the Bible to mean whatever the fuck they want when they read it. No where does it say that.

  • samus12345@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    0·
    1 month ago

    It’s a funny joke that cats are assholes and dogs are good boys, but dogs are the subservient people-pleasers they are because we’ve bred them that way for the past 30,000 years. Cats are still only semi-domesticated after the 10,000 or so years we’ve been living with them. I suppose it fits with the “be subservient, go to Heaven, be independent, go to Hell” Christian narrative.

    • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
      0·
      1 month ago

      Cats will never domesticated because they were already doing useful things for humans so there was never any need.

      Dogs needed to be domesticated because the wild wolves they originated from kept trying to eat their handlers. Over time they were bred to be more docile. Presumably chihuahuas were an accident